Sisyphus

for James.

 

Why? 

Why must we

   imagine him

happy?

 

Even the words

          press—

a weight.

        

         Must?

 

Have you

         not seen

   the sand

         like glass

beneath his nails?

or the ash

    embedded deep

     where the stone

burrows 

its mark?

 

Have you

        not looked

   to his hands—

blistered

         with questions

       he did not know

were his own

to ask?

 

     Even

         his 

                   silence

aches

    to be known

 

There are no gods here.

       They left the mountain

a long time ago—

only the wind remains,

                 and the form that

forgetting takes

  when nothing

     is left to be

named

 

Happy?

 

The air,

the dust,

the stone—

even the breath

  feels empty.

 

Where would it live

                this happiness?

   in the lean of the slope?

in the dryness

         of his spit

                     as he climbs

again

       and again

and  

         again?

 

Would it

         flicker still

in the body

     he no longer

   knows

as his own?

 

And if it came

        to meet him

would he even

        recognize it

or

    pass it by,

thinking it

         stone?

 

If it spoke,

      would it choose his voice?

                     or the river

         veining the valley,

  the cloud

      softly unforming,

   or whisper

in the rain

      loosening  

         the dust

from the stone?

 

Where would he find it?

    at the summit—

   or in each step

taken

     again

          and again

  and again

without promise,

without purpose —

 only

  presence?

 

         Imagine?

 

Perhaps

       because the gods

left the answer—

in the silence

           we enter

 by naming.

 

Imagine

 

perhaps the stone

does not speak,

   because it waits—

         for us

to give

         it voice.

 

Imagine 

           if

    the struggle

is not the absence

of freedom,

     but its very form.

 

   Imagine 

if

         the gods

     never left?

        but were always

in the stone,

the dust, 

     the air

waiting

         to be revealed

 

Imagine.